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Movie Review: The Twilight Saga Eclipse, The Bella Swan Virus

Stephenie Meyer wrote the four books of The Twilight Saga because she badly wants to be a girl fought over by two handsome guys. That's normal. Most girls want that.

But Stephenie Meyer didn't stop there. She has bigger dreams. And these dreams are not funny anymore.

Read my review of the movie The Twilight Saga: Eclipse below.

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse Movie Review

The Twilight Saga are movies based on a series of books by Stephenie Meyer about Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) who was caught in a love triangle with a vampire Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) and a werewolf Jacob Black (Taylor Lautner). Bella will have to stand in the middle of the strife between vampires and werewolves and later, between vampires and more vampires.

If we take the fluff of the vampire versus werewolves story aside, we will see that The Twilight Saga is merely Stephenie Meyer daydreaming. And that aspect is more evident in the third installment called Eclipse, than in the previous two movies, Twilight and Newmoon.

Stephenie Meyer is daydreaming that she is Bella Swan fought over by a vampire and a werewolf.

In her first dream, she was courted by a vampire whose skin twinkles under the sunlight. In her second dream, the vampire needs to go so she can get close with the werewolf. And in the third dream, she has to chose between the two of them.

However, so that Stephenie Meyer gets full satisfaction of the dream, she needs to kick both of her lovers in the butt first.

The Bella Swan Virus

Let's call this egoistic-butt-kicking dream The Bella Swan Virus because like all virus, it is bad and it should be stopped.

If there is a villain in these movies, it is not the newborns or the Volturi, but the vicious Bella Swan herself.

She's like a frail bamboo tree swaying left to right, hitting all other trees close to her. She's an out-of-control Flying Fiesta.

Bella Swan is playing with her lovers feelings and then pretending she doesn't know what she's doing. She's crushing their hearts and sucking the blood out of them. (Good for Edward, he has a cold bloodless heart.)

I don't recommend that the ladies watch The Twilight Saga: Eclipse because they might catch the virus. They will imitate what Bella Swan did to her lovers, because that is what every fan does, they imitate what their idol does.

Believe me, the world doesn't need more Bella Swans.

I recommend that men watch the movie so they would be wary of the modus operandi of women inflicted with the Bella Swan Virus.

Stephenie Meyer is a bad girl. She took her daydreaming way too far.

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